


I Gave You My Heart

by trinsghost



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Adult Content, F/M, Oral Sex, Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-15
Updated: 2018-02-15
Packaged: 2019-03-19 04:59:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13697349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trinsghost/pseuds/trinsghost
Summary: Hi everyone!  I wrote this story for robertgrey-aka-pennywise on tumblr for the IT Secret Valentine exchange.  I'm there as clown-in-the-well.  Hope you enjoy the tale, and if Pennywise and/or IT isn't your thing, that is okay.





	I Gave You My Heart

“The dress looks wonderful on you dear,” my Mom paused, spinning me around for dramatic effect, the skirt and light petticoat lifting in the air. “Marilyn Monroe would be envious.”

“This is Marilyn’s style though, isn’t it. I mean, Seven Year Itch but in dark red, right?” I asked, fidgeting with the halter top portion and feeling like I was showing an awful lot of skin.

“You look perfect, Y/N. Just hold off on fidgeting with your dress, and stand up straight,” she fussed. “Keep your coat, cardigan and boots on til you get in and help get everything settled for the event, and then you can doff the winter gear in the basement and enjoy yourself. I Wish I could head down with you, but with your Father still recuperating, I wanna stick around and be here if he needs me.”

“I gotcha, and no worries Mom. I wanted to help with this. I think I’ll have plenty of assistance with your committee. I should get going,” I eyed my watch, hugging Mom and grabbing everything I had left to pack in my truck, heading out into the snowy Valentines Day morning.

Since the weather this time of year tended to be too snowy for an outdoor event, Derry’s annual Valentine’s Festival gets held in the town library. My Mom has been the head event organizer for five years, but called on me to help after Dad suffered a mild stroke. I’d been back in town for a week since the family emergency, the first time I’ve set foot here since I was a small child and I ended up volunteering as soon as Mom mentioned it.

Heading into the library, I was greeted by a few of my Mom’s fellow town event committee members, who’d introduced themselves the week I first arrived. We made quick work of bringing in bags from my truck and as I was about to head to the basement, one of the ladies on the committee (Ms Barnett, also one of the librarians) handed me a thick, leather bound book with a sticky on it.

“Your cousin had me check this out for you. He said that you should read it to brush up on local history,” I looked down at the cover with a frown. Derry Town History. ‘Please read this as soon as you can. Will be over in a few hours. Pay attention to the pictures, too. Love and hugs - Ben’

“Oo-kay. The last time I was here was before I started kindergarten, so most of this will be new to me, but thanks!” I nodded, heading down the stairs. Each step down had bits of memories flooding back to me, as if I were repeating a series of motions to achieve the same result. I vaguely recalled my very last visit to the library as a child...

============ 27 years ago =============

There I was darting around the main room of the Derry Library on another snowy Valentine’s Day, in a beautifully hand sewn dress reminiscent of Alice in Wonderland, with a sucker in one hand and a decorated box of popcorn in another. My cousin was in town for the week with his parents and was spending the day with a local friend. I on the other hand had been filled with sugary treats, and was welcome to wander to my heart’s content. Skipping down the stairs, down, down and deeper into the building, I found myself at the bottom step and took off into a sprint, giggling and screaming my way around the rows of bookshelves.

Hearing the sounds of happy, almost calliope-like music behind me, I craned my head to look back and headed straight into a pair of legs. A really long pair of legs, in fact, belonging to none other than a circus clown! His dark blue eyes sparkled under the fluorescent lights, shining red lips pulled into a slow smile as he bent over to help me back onto my feet.

“Hi!” I chimed in without a hint of fear. “Sorry I ran into you, Mister.”

“That’s okay little one. You were having fun running through the stacks, weren’t you,” he said cheekily, his raspy, sing-song voice capturing my attention.

“Uh huh! Umm, I should probably head back up now. They’re about to give away cotton candy and start games!” I bounced on my heels excitedly.

“Ooh! That sounds like fun! I’ll be up in a bit to join in, but for now would you like a balloon?” he asked, squatting down to my height.

“Really? Sure? Do you do balloon animals?”

The clown frowned, seeing as he was just about to hand me a big red one with words on it.

“I meant no dis..dis...respect,” The word finally came to me. “I’ve seen other clowns do neat things with loooong balloons, like make doggies, butterflies and crowns.”

“My my, such big words for such a little lady,” he gasped, smiling widely. “How old are you?”

Holding up a few fingers and staring at each as I counted, I replied. “I’m three...and a half! I turn four in a few months”

“Three and a half! That’s almost ancient!” the clown grinned, earning a giggle from me. “I’m going to make you a special balloon. A big heart..I think it fits you.”

The clown proceeded to pull a long, red balloon from his sleeve and blow it up like a big sausage, crossing his eyes as it grew to several feet in length. I grinned and laughed as he bent and twisted and worked on his design, his tongue sticking out of his mouth to show how hard this balloon making business really was.

“There! One big, beauti-ful heart balloon for…” he cocked his head, and I realized I never told him my name.

“Y/N!” I blurted out my first name, giggling and blushing as he held the balloon out to me. I ducked my head, letting him hang it around my neck. “What’s your name, Mister?”

“My name’s Pennywise. Pennywise the Dancing Clown!” he bowed, little bells on his clothes jingling, punctuating the last word in his name as he stood back up.

“Thank you Pennywise!” Looking down at one of the treats I had, an idea hit me. “Would you like this popcorn? We just made it.” I held up a red and white striped box of freshly made popcorn, the top sealed shut by a sparkly red construction paper heart.

Pennywise grew silent, eyes going wide when I gave him the small box that smelled of warm, salted, buttery goodness. Taking it into his gloved hands, he nodded back to me with a small smile. “Thank you, Y/N. I bet it’s time for games and treats, time for you to head back up!”

“Wait! Are you coming?” I asked, my bottom lip jutting out. Toeing the floor with one of my shoes, I was hoping my new friend would join me in the fun.

“I’ll be there in a bit. Go on now!” he shooed me up the stairs.   
I could hear his laughter behind me, but when I turned around on the way up, he was gone.

============ present day ============

It’s been 27 years, yet it felt like I hadn’t missed a day. Heading back to the Library on the day of Valentine’s Day celebrations was a bit surreal, but this time around I had responsibilities and much less opportunity to wander during the activities. Ultimately I would be stationed at the welcome table to pass out colorful paper sacks full of valentines made by the local elementary and middle school kids. Hopefully after finishing that, I could meander, talk to the locals and wander around the basement a bit...just for fun.

The festival had a “Back in Time” theme, volunteers excitedly talking about adults and kids in all manner of costumes from the past planning to attend. Eager to pare down to my costume, I made way to the stacks to ensure everything we needed for the event was brought upstairs. After confirming that, I dropped my coat, cardigan and the history book off in the office, slipping off my snow boots to dry by a radiator. Turning around, I looked down to grab my black high heeled sandals (had just left them on the floor in a bag), but they were nowhere to be found. Heading out of the office and well away from the staircase, I padded barefoot across the cold tile floor in search of my shoes.

As I walked along the bookshelves, tracing my fingertips along spines great and small, old and new, I came upon a half dozen books laying on the floor. I picked each one up one by one, glancing at the cover and first page or two, letting the smell of ink printed paper fill my senses before I slipped them back in their home shelves.

‘Horton Hears a Who’. I smirked at the tattered cover, looking for its spot on the shelf. The next book lay opened on the floor. ‘9 and a Half...Weeks. Wait, is this really a library book?’ Looking at the spine, I was surprised to see it was, and slipped it back into a shelf. But not before reading a few pages first. ‘Circus Excite...huh. Romance under the big top’. Walking up to the last book, I had to stifle a laugh. ‘Monsters Eat Whiny Children. Now who the hell would read this?’

Heading around a corner, I ran into my sandals and looked back and forth down the aisle, convinced someone was pulling a prank on me. Picking up the left one, I noticed a small flower tucked under the toe and pulled it out. A tiny gardenia bud, barely blooming wafted its sweet scent from the palm of my hand. Twirling the flower by its stem, I remembered what my grandmother told me about gardenias as a child, and what it meant to receive one.

“It means someone thinks you are very lovely, my dear. Someone who cares for you, though you may not know it,” she said with a warm smile, trimming a huge wall of the creamy white flowers in the backyard.

Shaking my head to clear the pleasant memory, I took a gentle sniff of the petals as I bent down, clasping my fingers around the ankle straps of my sandals. I sank against the nearest shelf, leaning sideways to slip my foot through the straps of one heel when something shiny and moving caught my eye. Looking up, I exhaled a shuddering breath as dozens of hollowed out Valentine’s hearts floated slowly from the ceiling down towards me. Red, white, purple and pink hearts, shimmering and seemingly light as air flitted all around me. Holding out a hand, I could’ve sworn they were bubbles or balloons, but when two red hearts fell onto my palm, my eyes widened in surprise.

They had a solid feel and heft to them, as if they were made of a lightweight metal. Barely wider than my splayed hand, the opening on each was big enough for me to slip through and wear them as bangles. I eyeballed them both as they hung delicately from each wrist before rolling my eyes and moving to take them off.

That’s when things took a bizarre turn. I felt a sudden pull from both cuffs, an unseen force yanking me back to connect with a shelf behind me.

“Damn,” I looked back, trying to yank my wrists free from the shelving just behind and above my waist. The heart cuffs wouldn’t give an inch. “These must be magnetized.”

Looking back and forth, I raised an eyebrow at the faint music playing somewhere in the basement. Was that...calliope music?

 

“Sharp thinking, little one,” a raspy, sing-song voice echoed to my right, rounding the far end of the aisle. 

A true blast from the past sauntered up to me, looking exactly as he did when I last saw him...twenty something years ago. Same silvery grey antique costume, adorned with puffs, ruffs, orange poofs and a pair of comedically large clown shoes. Same tufts of fiery orange hair curling gently away from his head. And the same smooth, maroon lines adorning his face and mouth, drawing attention to the paleness of his skin. And those eyes...those blue eyes that I could just about drown in without a care in the world, they were staring right back into mine.

“P-Pennywise?” I whispered, scarcely believing what I was seeing.

“In the flesh! My my, has it really been this long?” His breath faltered as he took a step forward, giving me a lingering once over. “You’ve grown into a...lovely young woman. I can still see the light in your eyes. The childish glee is still there,” he clasped his gloved hands together, running his fingers over one another. 

“Y/N, you came back after all this time, and on Valentine’s Day too,” he grinned, leaning against the bookshelf and towering over me.

“Yeah,” I laughed nervously, not realizing just how freaking TALL he was. Then again, his height didn’t phase me as a small child. No one’s did. I was truly fearless back then. “You haven’t aged a day. Are you taking some sort of vitamins or magic potion I don’t know about?”

“Pshh, no,” he chuckled, tilting his head to look at my feet. “Need any help with that?” he pointed to my shoeless left foot, my sandal lying a few feet away.

“Umm, sure. If you’d be so kind?” I smiled, still fidgeting with my cuffed wrists.

He raised himself up, taking a gigantic step over to my sandal, picking it up gingerly by a strap. Stepping back over to me, he dropped back down and grasped my foot around the ankle. He was just about to slip the strap over the front of my foot when I had a flash of a dirty thought. Biting my lip to hold back any untoward reaction, I was startled to see Pennywise stop, seemingly dazed by something and look up at me, an eyebrow raised curiously.

A few moments passed, and I could start feeling beads of sweat drip down my back. This was getting a little awkward.

“Are..y-you alright Pennywise?” I asked, watching him watch me rather intently. One side of his mouth curled up in a very slow, devious smirk and his eyes glittered with something I couldn’t quite make out. Looking down to the floor, he picked up two pink hearts that had nearly slid under the bookshelf. He looked up to me, waggling his brow as he took one of the hearts, opening it and latching it around my right ankle. Taking my ankle in his hand, he pulled it behind me. I felt it connect to the shelf and begin to panic.

“I should’ve known these cuffs were your doing. What are you up to? I need to get back upstairs and help start the event!” I said, my voice starting to rise above the din of the music that began playing.

“Oh, they don’t need you just yet,” he smiled, a hand reaching to play with the hem of my dress. Closing his eyes, he inhaled deeply through his nose. “Mmm, I was hoping for that.” Opening his eyes, I noticed the blue bleeding out of his pupils in favor of a warm, dark amber, his focus remaining on the skirt of my dress.

“Hoping for what? I don’t understand what you mea..” I tried asking, jumping when he lifted and floofed the front of my dress up, diving under the layers of material. I felt him move closer to me and let out a high pitched squeak when his nose came in contact with my underwear.

“That’s it. Ah, how I LOVE that scent,” he moaned from beneath my skirt. I hoped he didn’t mean something to do with pheromones or my own body scent, but when his nose, followed by lips ran over my crotch, moving up to inhale, bite the waistband and SNAP it against my skin, I figured out very quickly what he meant.

“Oh my godpleasedon’t,” I blurted out, chest heaving when he popped back up from under my dress, face hovering inches from my own.

“Tell me you didn’t hear the music,” he whispered, eyes watching me closely.

“The music? You mean the stuff playing upstairs?” He shook his head no as I tried to figure him out. “The calliope music? The tunes that sounded like the circus?” He nodded his head yes, slowly, his smile widening as he moved closer.

“The music...was in my head. It wasn’t playing anywhere here. It was only for me. That you happened to hear it, more than once is very curious.”

He dipped his head down towards my right shoulder, turning his face to run his lips along my neck. As he did, I had a realization of my own.

“Shit. You...that look you gave me as you kneeled down. You read my thoughts, didn’t you!”  
I was pissed. Beyond pissed! That was a violation of my mind! But wait, what I heard from him, he might consider the same. Damnit, only he could be turn my reaction inside-out to serve his purpose. Running his mouth over the shell of my ear, I felt the tip of his tongue dart out, lapping the edge of my earlobe. Shivering at the sensation, I felt what he was so keen to hone in on earlier. My core twinged slightly, and my sudden, poorly timed sense of self preservation kicked in to try and pull my thighs together.

“Ah ah ah!” he chided me, knocking a knee against my free leg, pulling my thighs further apart. Taking another deep breath, I watched his eyes change color again, amber bleeding red around the edges. “It doesn’t matter one bit if you stay quiet,and hide your words from me. You can’t hide up.in.here,” he lifted a hand, tapping a finger against the side of my head.

I whimpered out loud as my mind let loose with a barrage of expletives. ‘We can read each other’s minds. How? HOW?!?’

Chuckling against my ear, I felt his finger leave the side of my head, splayed hand travelling slowly, leisurely down my side to rest over my hip. “The floodgates are opened, Y/N. And I’m enjoying what I’m hearing, smelling, seeing. YeSsSSs, so very much.” His mouth ran over the side of my face, hovering over my lips as he pressed his forehead against mine. Swallowing thickly, I closed my eyes, trying a last ditch effort to hide myself from him. That’s when I felt the connection, tensing in his arms as my memories hit in rapid succession.

Age 4: I got a clown doll for my birthday. I drew Pennywise’s face on a piece of paper and pinned it to the front of the clown’s head. He was my favorite toy for years. I even altered the doll to look more like him as I grew older.

Age 12: My first crush was a total letdown. Laying on my bed, tears staining the pillowcase, I soothed my first bout of heartache thinking about him. How kind he was. He’d never break my heart like so-and-so did.

Age 16: First sexual experience. It wasn’t mind blowing, but it did pique my curiosity where sex was concerned. I wondered if he ever did such a thing. If he took pleasure from it. The thoughts made me blush and giggle incessantly, thinking about him in that way. I was ridiculous, but couldn’t help wondering...what if?

Age 17: First solo sexual experience. Wanting to explore the depths of self pleasure, I let myself think about him freely, wantonly. I was so excited to come the first time to thoughts of him, he became my go-to when I wanted a quickie in my mind.

Age 24: Married to my college sweetheart. He’s handsome, funny and sweet. But could he ever top him? Maybe. We’ll give it some time.

Age 27: Divorced. He cheated on me with a mutual friend we met in college. I feel broken. I never want to feel again.

I felt his lips move against mine. He was speaking, though I was too zoned out to make out the words. Sucking in a deep breath, my eyes fluttered open, heart dropping into my stomach as I stared into his eyes.

“All those years, you grew up (because I let you). You never forgot about me, even after moving away. And you took a liking to me. Don’t deny it. I can smell it on you, the want mingled with intoxicating fEaR. And the memories. How many times did you slip your hands over yourself, between your legs and cry out my name,” he bit his lip, throat rumbling in satisfaction as he relished the thought. I watched a bead of saliva slip down over his mouth, the drip elongating as his bottom lip jutted out. Reaching forward, I ran the tip of my nose against his, opening my mouth to him and feeling his drool run down my own chin. Pulling away, I closed my eyes, breath wavering as I processed the taste of him in my mouth.

Pennywise chuckled darkly, reacting warmly to my first move. Slipping a hand around the side of my head, he pressed me back against the bookcase, taking my mouth with his in a deep, passionate kiss. Our tongues, lips and occasionally...teeth collided as we embraced, my body desperately wanting to wrap around his. Pulling away from my lips, he smirked as a trail of spit connected the two of us. Dropping back down to his knees, he gave me a wicked gaze before throwing the skirt of my dress back over his head.

Within a fraction of a heartbeat, he had a hand grasping my left ankle, spreading that leg further apart than it had been before. My jaw dropped at what dangled from around his wrist. My flowery, lacy underwear somehow found their way off of me.

I felt his breath ghost over my sex, and his underwear bedecked arm snaked its way under my leg, lifting it over his shoulder. Within a minute, he had me twitching and sopping wet under his ministrations, teasing and licking me until I began arching away from the bookshelf. Lifting the front of my dress over his head to give me a very clear view, our eyes locked as he nibbled and wrapped his lips over my clit, sucking the tiny bud under his two front teeth, sending waves of twitching, delicious pleasure through me.

Pulling himself from the floor, he dropped and smoothed my dress down, taking the remaining pink heart on the floor and cuffing it to my left ankle. Attaching my remaining free limb to the bookshelf, he eyed me, breathing heavily as he wiped a sheen of come from around his mouth. I panted as I watched him, my chest heaving, nipples pressed against the thin fabric of my halter top. Looking down, Pennywise watched as my breasts rose and fell, his mouth falling open as he stood, almost as if he were in a hypnotic trance. Shaking himself from the moment, bells jingling on his costume almost as if to wake him, he looked up to me, one side of his mouth pulling up in a half smile.

Leaning in to capture my mouth in another kiss, I felt his hands wander down the front of my halter top, thumbs running circles over my peaked nipples. Soon he was curling trembling fingertips over the material, pulling each side back toward my ribcage. As his jaw widened and worked to deepen our kisses, his hands cupped and squeezed my breasts, pinching and tickling my nipples til gooseflesh pebbled the skin, sending tiny zaps of electricity straight to my core.

Pulling a hand from my left breast and his lips from mine, his mouth slipped to my ear. He moaned as his hand traveled south, slipping into his costume.

“Y/N. Y/N, my little one. Can you guess what I’m thinking about right now?” he giggled, his raspy, strained laugh sending pulses along my neck. I closed my eyes and slowed my breathing, letting my mind connect to his thoughts once more. 

What I saw had me whimpering in anticipation. He’d plucked a single moment from a favorite movie of mine. He grinned against my head as the realization came to me, and I uttered the one word he wanted to hear.

“Atonement.”

With that single word, Pennywise lifted the bottom of my dress. The skirt and petticoat bunched up into eager hands as he pressed the wads of tufted material above my navel. Spreading the tops of my thighs further, he pressed against me what he had so deftly taken out a minute earlier. Stroking it in his satin gloved hands, he spread my folds and rubbed the flanged tip against my entrance, eyes catching mine as he filled me inch by agonizing inch. He continued thrusting again and again, hands gripping my hips, hot, fevered kisses covering my mouth until our climaxes overtook us both. His lips slipped from mine, teeth finding purchase on the low side of my neck, which is where they stayed as his hips rolling frantically against mine, slowly losing their rhythm as my walls squeezed and pulsated around him, milking him of his seed.

I hadn’t realized one of the cuffs had come loose from the shelves until then. I’d been stroking the back of his hair as we came, gripping it tightly when the initial waves of orgasmic bliss hit me. I ran my fingers through the end of his locks, marvelling at how soft it was. Looking over to his face, I noticed blood around his mouth from the wound on my neck and smirked at him. He smiled back, blood coating the ends of his teeth, particularly his two front teeth. I chuckled softly at how silly he looked, only to suck in a breath as he slowly began licking his lips.

Moving my hips against the shelf, I felt an obvious fullness in my lower belly, slipping a hand under my dress to press against it. Pennywise shuddered as soon as I touched the area, his mouth slipping to rest against my shoulder.

“That...would be me,” he said, panting through a smile as I rubbed circles over my belly.

“Really...so if I do this,” I rubbed a small circle high up against the bump, eliciting another shudder and a moan from him. Gripping my arms at my elbows, he gave me a dark look that had me questioning my actions for a moment.

“That, is a lot like this,” he said, slipping a hand down between my legs to tease me in kind, flicking and pinching my clit until I screamed into his mouth.

“Okay! I yield! Oh god, Pennywise I yield please. Please don’t stop. Please,” I begged him.

Thirty minutes and two more earth shattering orgasms later, we were quietly, soothingly straightening each other’s clothing. And he finally put on my left heel, stroking my leg as he slipped it on.

Wincing as he stroked the tender bite marks on my neck, he lifted the straps of my dress a touch higher to hide his handiwork. Looking up at him, I wished he could join me upstairs for the Festival, but knew for some reason, he couldn’t.

Pressing a soft kiss to my forehead, followed by a lingering press of lips, we parted, hands untangling as I backed away, turning to head upstairs.

“I will see you again later, Pennywise,” I nodded to him.

“Absolutely,” he nodded back, bowing as I took to the stairs.

I raised an eyebrow on my way up as his parting thought echoed in my mind.  
“I’m SO glad I didn’t eat you.”


End file.
